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Cadryn Tiberius · **04-13-2017, 02:03 PM**

“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.” Matthew 6:14

The moon shines brightly through the overcast of a cool April night. In the distance we see Cadryn sitting on a stump, a roaring fire burns directly in front of him. As he leans forward, he places his elbows on his knees before picking up a bottle of Crown Royale and taking a couple of quick swigs. Cadryn sits the half empty bottle back on the ground beside him.

For 10 years you sat docile, pretending to be the man your daddy never could be. You laid around the house on the weekends. Stephanie in one arm, kids in the other, living a life you'd always imagined. Your weekdays spent selling overpriced used cars to a buncha morons who wouldn't know a good price if it kicked em in the dick. That was your life, Mike. That was the last time you ever felt like a winner, and understandably so. I mean, you're just now starting to break even. And when you're right, you're right. I did idolize you, Mike. You were my all time favorite wrestler and I looked up to you. I stood behind you through the losses, I stood behind you through all the “demonic possession", I even stood behind you before you even knew who I was. I wasn't a bandwagon fan, I was a real fan. But those days are long gone my friend. There were a lot of things we didn't agree on, mainly your physical and mental abuse of innocent people. You want to spout facts off randomly about my career, that's fine, I've got nothing to hide. But let's analyze your career as well, shall we?

XWF Wildcard Night 1 - Your return to the XWF match. Against a man you claimed had stolen your life's work and shit all over it. I'll give you credit, you did win that match. Oh, but wait, the other Graves never even put up a fight. Nothing at all. So at best, it was a free win, no real gratification necessary.

Wednesday Night Warfare - This was the show on the cruise ship. You spent most of your time bitching about management, and your accommodations, and your wife. And then you had your match with Thaddeus Duke. And boy oh boy did he beat that ass. Hell, Jesus revived Robbie Bourbon, but even he is limited in miracles. Not even a miracle could have helped you that night.

Savage Saturday Night - You managed to gain a little confidence, you managed to get yourself patched up, and for what? Oh, that's right, another loss. Yet again, you had that ass beat black and blue. This time but former Hart Champion, Robbie Bourbon. I'm starting to sense a pattern here, Mike.

Wednesday Night Warfare - After a couple of losses, you'd think you'd get up on that ole horse and try again. Fraid’ not. Instead of even giving er the old college try, you tucked tail and conveniently “went to the wrong place” thus losing yet another match. This time against a well known scrub in Killjoy.

Lethal Lottery Round 1 - Now here is a good example of what Micheal Graves is truly about. This man gets teamed up with Doctor D’ville, a legend, a hall of famer. And what does Graves do? He sits back while Doc carries him onto the next round. Pathetic.

So for those keeping score at home, that puts him at a barely passable record of two wins and three loses.

Savage Saturday Night - Chris Chaos. For whatever goddamn reason, Paul Heyman’s fatass thought you deserved a shot at the Universal Title. So he made the match, and you trained hard, boy. Harder than you've ever trained before. You were sure you were gonna be the Universal Champion, you had it set in your heart and mind. Now, granted, even I agree that you probably did win that match. But that's not the point. The point is you lost yet another match. The biggest one yet! Fact of the matter is, you just weren't good enough.

I don't feel the need to continue, because the pattern remains the same. You either lose, or you end up being carried by someone who is better than you. Is that really what Ax3 is all about? You needing carried around the XWF because you're so old and busted you're just not up to snuff anymore, Mike? Caedus and Main are on a level you've never and will never reach. Oh, and for the record, before I move on. Just remember, I'm already 1-0 against you in tag matches, just sayin’.

I was right to ask you to lighten up and try and be more funny, Mike. Your shit is so goddamn boring it makes me piss myself. Until I came along you were the dildo walking around looking like a worn out groupie. You had not an ounce of creativity. I'm the sole reason you didn't just get fucked on by everybody day in and day out. I defended you with my comedic genius, because no one could combat it. I pretended to need you to fight my battles and to protect me. In reality, I was protecting you from the world and yourself you arrogant son of a bitch.

Oh, and to drive the point home, the only partially funny thing you said was that little kindergarten joke you made about my “entire career”. I'm sure you thought that to be some breakthrough of comedic genius, because hey, you think everything you do is “amazing”. You know what would be truly amazing? For one of those shitty used cars you used to sell to come alive and fuck you to death with it's gear shift. Maximum Overdrive style. Speaking of movies, y'all probably think you're so smooth referencing the fact that I resemble Kevin Bacon. Seeing as how you managed to reference all of his movies in some type of autistic analogy dead set on chapping my ass. Well, you've failed. I love Kevin Bacon and I take it as a compliment. So hah! See? I can make kindergarten jokes too.

Did it make you feel powerful to lay your hands on a 13 year old girl? A CHILD. You sick, sadistic, dickless, little cunt. You pick fights you know you can win. You put your hands on the defenseless because your pussy is bigger than Mains after Caedus is done plowing it.

You're weak, you're pathetic, and worst of all you're a coward. But, that's okay, Mike. Because when we finally meet in that ring, I'm going to show you what a real man looks like. I'm gonna give you the beating your daddy shoulda years ago.

Cadryn reaches for the bottle of Crown Royale and takes a few more sips before placing on the ground once more. Cadryn stands up and begins to pull his wallet from his jeans. He slowly takes his Michael Graves trading card out and stares at it.

Ain't no better place for ya then hell, son.

Cadryn tosses the card into the fire, the embers crackling and popping as it turns to ash.

Mr. Main, I see you managed to take time away from the all you can suck buffet at your local watering hole to put your two cents on the table. Good times, bud. I'm honestly happy for you. You and Graves go together like two dickless, shit for brained, peas in a pod. I like how you say “we ain't got no beef.” Why? You a vegetarian, pussy? I can't blame you. I wouldn't want to meet an Adonis like myself inside the ring either. All my dirty secrets? You dumb bastard, all I ever did was put myself on blast for the whole world to see. Week in and week out I degraded myself for the entertainment of my loyal fans. Secrets, pfft. Idiot. Ain't no weaknesses I ever hid either, son. I made it well known what my strengths and weaknesses are and I still managed to mangle guys like you week after week. I was wrong in writing you off. I shouldn't discredit a man's accomplishments, that's not what Jesus would want. So I'll give credit where credit is due, you have beaten some big names. Unlike Graves, you actually proved yourself to be a worthy adversary on paper. But that's all it is, Rob. It's on paper. I can tell you're fond of paper, being a paper champion and all.

Ain't nobody around here thinking I'm a sleeper. I'm a well known, household name round’ these parts, dude. From Chaos to Blaq, they all know my name. They all know what I'm capable of. How far did you make it in Lethal Lottery? Because I made it to the last match, boy. I fucking put in my time. Where were you? Off winning the Hart title?

Oh, wait. That's actually a bigger accomplishment..

Fuck. Anyways, the point stands. I'm quickly becoming a legend around here. Whether you or Graves wanna believe it, the facts speak for themselves. I am the epitome of man, and the goddamn best at what I do.

Oh, and don't act like you ain't laugh at the pregnancy scare, douche. Ya'll laughed with the rest of the company, which is exactly what I wanted to happen. Im devoted to my craft. Be it comedy, or being myself, either way I'm devoted.

How you gonna stand there and say I'm half a man? What does that even mean? Am I half centaur, then? Get the fuck outta here with your lame ass trash talk and schoolyard insults. Half a man..I oughta slap you for being so friggin ignorant.

And since we're on the subject of stupidity, gentleman.

If I'm so goddamn bad at life in general why was the soon to be formed Ax3 so quick to save my ass a few weeks ago? Because you motherfuckers recognized the talent and the dedication, and y'all wanted me to be a part of what y'all were cookin up.

And so you know, I will wear my hat and boots to the ring with me on Saturday. Mama always said show up to a funeral in your Sunday best, and that what Saturday is gonna be. Y'all's funeral. Co-funeral, to be exact. And I don't mean kill ya. But I will bury y'all's careers, quick, fast and in a hurry.

By the way, Graves, if I was gay, as you still try and impose upon me, your baby gravy wouldn't at all be what I'd want, ya old pedophile. Go get ya dick off on some lunch meat before. You just mad cause these golden lock of power adorn my shoulder like a gift from the Gods.

All the while your scalp needs more management than a pizza place ran by the likes of Justin Sayn or Random.

Judgement day is coming, y'all. I'd suggest getting out of harm's way before it's too late.

Cadryn picks up the Crown Royale, knocks back what remains, and stomps on the fire, extinguishing every last ember…

Like I said earlier, those who forgive are forgiven. And Lord, I'm gonna need all the forgiveness I can get after Saturday..

(To be continued..)

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode Forgive me, Father, fore I have sinned
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