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~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **02-15-2014, 11:05 PM**

So, I was talking to someone on skype, and they mentioned it was their birthday soon. I offered to send an escort, and they declined on the basis of what if their mother caught them. That'd be one of the best stories ever. Period.

So, now I want to know your best story. I'll go first:

I was at the mall with Morbid Angel, his sister, and 3 of her friends I have not met before, except Dawn. Screw her. Anyway, I had just broken up with my EX, the crazy bitch, turns out she was on coke. Anyway, so she was a trained piercer and gave me a particular piercing. I won't say where, but let's say it's one I sort of regret. Anyway, my mother's best friend is a 26 year old girl who works with her, and this girl's fiance (now ex husband) heard about my piercing and came up to give me a hug for having said piercing. And he announced why he was hugging me to everyone. And Jake's sister was pregnant with my god daughter at the time.

Now you.

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