KICK OUT LIKE A BOSS!

Madison leaps to her feet.

Hi Thunder Knuckles, let me introduce MY-self! I'm "Better Than You." HOOOOOLEEEEE CHRIST, where do I start with this soft dick date rape of a human being?

How you gonna roll up on me and call me a hack, when you're like the one billionth unimaginative dipshit to make fun of a girl for her looks and her tits? I mean, I know you've got to throw out some kind of limp wristed slap of a verbal attack to sublimate the overwhelming avalanche of lusty thoughts you're having at the sight of this slammin' body, but maybe try to rub more than a couple brain cells together before you evacuate all that shit from your mouth.

Oh, oh! But this motherfucker is crowing about being from Ohio! FUCKIN' OHIO! The East Coast's hot take on flyover country! Listen you country bumpkin, heehaw strumming, weak chinned, overdoing it on Schlitz's at the Nascar race and getting ejected with your piss laden cargo shorts around your ankles wad of aborted medical waste, no one cares where you're from, who you are, or why you named yourself after a sex act you pleasure yourself to on PornHub 12 times a day. Seriously, give it a rest, your dick must look like an angry red pencil by now. I say "pencil" because the needle like nature of your penis is why you need to resort to PornHub so much in case you HURR DURR LET'S EXPLAIN JOKES UNTIL THEY'RE NOT FUNNY weren't smart enough to pick that up.

By the way, negative one million points for being so creatively lazy you just cribbed the description for Thunder Knuckle straight from Urban Dictionary. It's like two results down on a Google Search you colossal knob you thought I wouldn't know? Christ! She holds up her phone, after having just performed the search.

So, yeah, I got a prediction for you. Let's go old school.



I predict you're gonna last here a couple months, give or take. I predict you will continue to prove yourself to be a hollow, one note, on the level of a knock-knock joke, running gag with an expiration date of YESTERDAY until you get bored with all the losing and absolutely no one taking you seriously and piss off back to Ohio to fuck your underage cousin with a chest as flat as that "bomb" joke you laid on me. I predict you are going to be so spectacularly unimpressive that you won't even make it into the XXX Joke Wrestler Hall of UnLegends that James Raven will hold next year after losing a drunken bet to Shane to see who can shove an unpeeled potato up their asshole the fastest.


Yes, that's right. People will actually remember names like Mingermind, and Bilbo, and Chasm before they remember YOU. What a sad state of affairs. What a sad person. What a sad pin attempt.

Go gargle some bleach asswipe.