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**12-16-2016, 11:21 AM**

RADICAL/ZEPHYR/XWF#015

☆☆☆☆☆

A light breeze causes trickles across a lake somewhere in the midwest. Eyeslashes flicker against the gust, lids close to protect eyes from the wind. 'The Radical' sits on an old chopped log on the pebble filled dirt just beyond the waters edge. He tosses a pebble that reverberates circular ripples. Reaching in his pocket he slide unlocks his cell; new message. "What the hell happened at the training facility?" A blank look, he shuts off the phone and puts it back in his left pantleg pocket. The sun falls within a timelapse just over the hills in the distance. Sitting in the dark, nearly all the pebbles around him are gone. He picks up the last one he see's near, looking at it for a second. Whispering something to himself, he tosses it further out, but no water piercing sound occurs. He smirks to himself wondering how, then remembers what he whispered.

"FLY AWAY ON MY ZEPHYR"

A magical feeling tingles within, the camera zoom runs to the airborne pebble floating along a gentle stream of wind into the moonlight.

☆☆

The silver highlight of the moons gaze illuminates a distinct path Gabe Reno now follows back up to a parking area. A hard step, a sound, then a quick turn back toward the lake, he contemplates for an instant then walks forward again. Step by step getting more urgent; with the sense he is being followed lingering in his subconcious. Making it to a break in the trail, he tries to remember which way he entered. His mind begins to argue with itself.

That way, it was that way... there's a tree I past... and, and a bush... wait, that bush on the other side looks a lot like it. Damnit, why didn't I listen to Survivorman and break branches. Fuck. Okay, okay... stay calm. Just go down one for a while and if it doesn't seem familiar walk back and take the other. Fuck, it is getting late though. Gotta get up and find a new training center tomorrow morning. What was that sound? Am I playing tricks on myself... why would I do that... fuck. Okay, left it is. No! Right.

He turns in virtual circles trying to decipher a direction, forgetting his phone probably has navigation and GPS. His mind races. Just as another sound breaks branches beside him. Out step tiny two gnomes, one with orange troll hair, and one that appears to be smurf blue. Gabe rubs his eyes.

Fuck, how long have I been sitting out here, I have gone nuts... finally, after all these years, I have finally lost the screw I had loose. Great. Right before a TV Title match. Fan-fucking-tastic.

The gnomes inch closer in shuffling delight, and take a wiff of him, then begin to circle and hum some type of song. They stop at once. Then annoyingly echo eachothers words.

WHAT... are yee doing in thy forest!?

WHAT... in thy forest!?

Gabe looks on in disbelief, but thinks it better to cooperate with the complete mental lapse than fight it.

Well, see I am a wrestler in XWF... I have a match and snapped on my trainer and sparring partner, so I came out here to the quiet for some reflection. Sat by the lake for a bit, threw some pebbles...

YEE... dost throw the enchanted LAKE PEBBLES!?

YEE!?

Reno's face frows pale with confusion, he takes a few steps back and puts his hands on his temples.

HOW... many enchanted pebbles!?

Pebbles!? Enchanted pebbles!?

He didn't say that second part. FUCK! I don't know, I threw them until I didn't see anymore to throw, then came back up here.

The gnomes make loud screeching noises and run around in circles.

ALL... yee threw them all!? Enchanted lake pebbles grant wishes... yee buffoon. Thee cannot touch water, or thy turn to regular PEBBLES!

Buffoon!

Gabe laughs hysterically as the gnomes look at each other puzzled.

So, let me get this straight. This lake I used to come to as a kid, has magical enchanted pebbles all around water, but if they touch the water they turn to regular pebbles where you cannot grant wishes anymore? So, you are saying, I just threw 276 wishes away?

The shear number makes them squirm uncomfortably. Then it dawns on Gabe that one pebble never hit the water.

Wait! One never hit the water! It flew away into the night sky toward the moon!

AHH! THE NIXON STONE!!

IT LIVES!

NIXON!?

The gnomes congregate and talk amongst thenselves on whether to reveal details to an outsider but decide it is okay since Reno used to come there as a child.

NIXON! Was a man that came here once, saying he didn't believe in ghosts or afterlife. Yee picked up that stone and tried to throw it into the lake, but the lake would not take it!

IT SAID NO!

So what happened? Thomas Nixon?

He was cursed! Forever his stone will follow the zephyr to the moon until his shame increases to it's satisfaction!

UNTIL HE SUFFERS! AND YEE WHO THROWS IT MUST INFLICT IT!

Gabe laughs uncontrollably. The gnomes hear a beckoning call in the distance and run away back through the bush.

HEY WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU, GARDEN GNOMES? YOU LOOK LIKE INFLAMED AND BLUE BALLS AT THE SAME TIME. THERE IS SO MUCH I COULD LEARN FROM YOU... HOW DO YOU ENCHANT PEBBLES... WHY DOES WATER STOP IT... HOW DO GNOMES LIVE UNDETECTED EXCEPT FOR DISNEYLAND?

Just then the zephyr delivers the stone back to Gabe's feet. He picks it up and smiles, then looks up at the camera.

What, you don't believe in enchanted pebbles and the Nixon Stone? That's fine. You'll still fly away... BITCH.

☆☆☆☆☆

END.

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