The Commissioner's Office - Printable Version

The Commissioner's Office - Printable Version

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The Commissioner's Office - Lacklan - 02-01-2021

Sarah Lacklan, with a dress featuring ridiculously puffy sleeves and a hat covered in large feathers, sits behind a desk within a small room. Upon the desk is one of her famous notebooks, ink and feathered pen sitting next to it, and a nameplate on the front stating Anarchy Commissioner. To her left, in full view of anyone entering the room, is a large screen with the current rules for the Anarchy brand displayed:

No Flippy Stuff (You MAY jump off the top rope ONCE per match, but without flourish, spin, twist, or rotation)
No pottymouths! (aka, The Ruby Rule)
No Weapons/Hardcore wrestling (God loathes that garbage!)
Must be at Anarchy events at least two hours before opening bell (To be early is to be on time!)
Must stay for entire show (You can't improve without watching stars like me!)
Must provide ALL required promotional material (No one likes a Silent Sally!)
No outside interference (Win your matches clean...like when I defeated Roxy for the UGWC Global Championship!)
Must attend pre-show slide-show presentation (there will be a test!)
No making fun of Ruby (That's MY job!)

Below that is a convoluted list of weighted fines for infractions so minute and complicated that the team of XWF lawyers continually rub their collective heads in consternation.

She flashes her Billion $$$ Smile and eagerly awaits the first of what shall no doubt be many, MANY visitors from her new charges.

re:The Commissioner's Office - "Loverboy" Vinnie Lane - 02-01-2021

Dang it, Sar

The Commissioner's Office - Ruby - 02-01-2021

Ruby is the first one to come in. As the #NEW and three-time, three-time, three-time Anarchy Champ that only seems right.

Ruby: “Hey there, bud-bud! Issa so great to be seeing yousa!”

Unimpressed by the very bad Jar Jar impression, Sarah blankly stares at her. For now.

Ruby: “LOVE the new rule-ios! Just had ONE tiny Canadian question: what exactly qualifies as a 'jump'?”

re:The Commissioner's Office - Roxy Cotton - 02-01-2021

Sarah, you specifically told me you were going to use a different example...

re:The Commissioner's Office - Referee John X - 02-01-2021

I like this new commish! Rules matter!

Also... DAT ASS!

re:The Commissioner's Office - T.H.U.G.S - 02-01-2021

We see JB and Tommy passing by her little office, and JB peaks into the place. Then both of them look inside the room and see's the rules for her Anarchy shows, as Sarah was doing her thing in her notepad, they snicker at these "rules".

"Man, Anarchy is surrre gonna follow these rules she's enforcing. It's sure going to bring in ratings in the near future..."

"Tell me about it, it's like she thinks she Bill Watts or something like dat... I wonder why Vinnie let her roam free from her cage, I honestly thought she disappeared or something like that."

"Well, JB... when you are a white female with power and resources, damn near everyone is going kiss your ass... it comes with the territory."

Then they noticed Sarah looking at them with her eyes beaming at them.

"OH HAI LACKLAN!... CONGRATS ON YEER COMMISH BIS--"

JB hits him in the arm.

"Congrats on your commissioner role of Anarchy... I hope you do poorlyWELL in this role!"

Both men hold in their laughter as they look at her.

re:The Commissioner's Office - (Gravy_Xtreme_5000) - 02-01-2021

Fines? Can I just go ahead and request that payment information now?

Do you use cash app?

re:The Commissioner's Office - Roxy Cotton - 02-01-2021

#CoolKids use Venmo, bb.